Overlooked factors in making a Positive Change for your Happiness
We all strive for the better for ourselves throughout life whether that’s in health, money or relationships. We seek positivity so that we can be happy irrespective of the challenges that we face on a day to day basis. That said, there is a false misconception that happiness is somewhere else i.e. you have to be married to be happy, have immense wealth to be happy or drive a particular car to be happy.
This is not true — it is not somewhere else! It may be a positive feeling because you can drive a luxury car or live a life of comfort but comfort is not happiness. Comfort is “settling” and you are not here to settle, PERIOD.
You can however make certain overlooked positive changes in your behaviour towards yourself that will steer your overall happiness and thoughts of self. They are:
- Know that the change you want to see won’t happen overnight: We now live in an “Amazon Prime and Get Abs in only 2 weeks” kinda world where returns and the need for instant gratification is at its PEAK! How could we ever be made to feel guilty for wanting results straight away, right? Implementing a positive change such as losing weight for example, is a gradual process.
To achieve the acquired goal, we must also practice patience, have some rest, exercise and eat well as all these elements contribute to the desired result of shedding and/or gaining weight. It is therefore important to understand that the results of your positive change will come but it takes time and it requires consistency which leads me to the next point. - Consistency in your actions: We start something, don’t get a result straight away and so we either quit, postpone or start something else that we don’t finish either. This bit is the, “I’m definitely going to stop/start [whatever it is] on Monday”. I’ve heard it, I’ve said it and I know you have too. Steven Bartlett, author of Happy Sexy Millionairebeautifully made my point on consistency clear in this quote:
“The power of consistency over time is both profound and underrated. It’s profound because it’s the most common factor in the story of every ‘successful’ person I’ve ever met, but it’s underrated because it’s totally invisible”.
I agree with consistency holding so much power yet being invisible because sometimes we don’t notice the little changes but it is the little changes that amount to the big change which will ultimately create the positive change in your life. I’m aware that our day to day experiences can sometimes make us slack when it comes to being consistent, so it’s also okay if you miss a day or two but just don’t make it a habit! - Say yes to discipline & no to harshness: Following on from, it’s okay to miss a day or two but don’t make it a habit, you should know that harshness is never the answer to making a positive change for your happiness. In fact when you feel you have lost the motivation to continue with the changes or stick to the plans you have set, start by:
- Acknowledging how you feel: If you are not in the mood for something, allow the mood to pass over and recognise that this is only temporary. Sometimes, we don’t listen to our bodies and automatically, we shift to being harsh on ourselves by “forcefully doing” to get over the mood. In doing so, we actually end up quitting or resenting something because we haven’t given ourselves enough time to allow the feeling of not being in the mood to pass. Remember, it is temporary, don’t reject the feeling, accept it and allow it to pass.
- If you lose motivation, find your reason why: This step involves you talking to yourself. Be honest and find out your reason for the positive change you want in your life. Ask yourself if your [why] is greater than your reason not to continue? You will find that in answering this question, it is all the motivation you need. If it doesn’t, then find a way to take small active steps towards the change. For instance, if you are planning to run a 5k marathon and you have lost motivation, start by power walking part of your training laps for the 5k marathon. This way, you are still contributing towards your fitness regime until you are disciplined to get back on track without being too harsh on yourself.
To conclude, seek mentors or those from whom you can learn from even if it’s in books and form your own judgement. You don’t have to know someone personally…I can’t begin to tell you how much watching certain videos from youtube, listening to podcasts, reading blogs like this and surrounding myself with positive energies have contributed to gaining insights that somehow shape aspects of how I write — I feel blessed with the information I have access to.
I hope you find these steps useful so that you can make positive changes that contribute to your happiness.
Thank you for reading.
Love & Light
Amida
